Jan's list here is honest and definitely reflects a lot of how I have felt as a member of clergy. I found it comforting to see that she often feels the same way I do. There is so much course work involved, and so much introspection, but there is still so much that can only be learned from experience. These are the things they don't tell you about becoming clergy.
https://hellenicdruid.com/2016/03/30/things-no-one-told-you-about-being-a-priest/?fb_action_ids=10107309631082635&fb_action_types=news.publishes&fbclid=IwAR0MWhCs8MwuaCqfNPyoE8vrsv0ZIvo2GvSRgZO_4ENyCDTQmtqI7L5y7dY
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Omen:
For this trance work, I wrote the script below, and then recorded myself reading it aloud. My own voice is not typically my favorite thing to listen to, but with trance work I’ve learned that I quickly forget that I am listening to myself and can begin the journey without any trouble. This trance was done as my sixth week of the Odyssey work, in which the raft has been built by Calypso and Odysseus and he sets sail toward home, leaving her behind. For this trance, I performed the same ritual as the week before, once again calling to Calypso to continue my work with her. During the working section, I then settled myself into a comfortable position, and began the recording of the script below. As the words were spoken, I could hear the waves begin to crash into the tiny raft I was sitting on. I could feel the wind on my skin and hear the birds in the sky high above me. I look around me and there is only ocean as far as the eye can see. I lay back on the raft and feel the rough wood against my back. I lay there and watch the sun begin to set and stars begin to glow brightly in the dark sky. In the darkness, I can see land up ahead of me, the fires of a city burning brightly against the darkness. However, as I near the land, dark clouds fill the sky and begin to roll toward me. Strong winds push me away from shore as the waters begin to grow choppy. The waves increase, growing rougher until they knock me into the bitter cold water. In that moment, I was overwhelmed with the fear of being lost, and thoughts of being alone forever. I begin to cry as I feel the fear of no one noticing that I’m gone. Just when I feel that all hope is lost, my head breaks the surface of the water, and I once again see my raft. I pull myself out of the water and back onto the raft. There I find a woman sitting and waiting. She is bright in the darkness, but her features are still hard to make out. Instead she exists just as a glow, almost like a firefly in the darkness. She hugs me, warming my skin and I feel dry again. She tells me these trials will make me stronger and to persevere. She says the gods are with me on this path and with hard work I will do great things. The raft breaks below my feet, but instead of crashing back into the water, she lifts me above it and flies me over the waters to the distant shore above. She leaves me in the sand, trying to catch my breath, and I open my eyes to find myself again seated at my altar. Script: Close your eyes, take a deep breath, and relax. You find yourself standing on the shore of a beautiful island. The sands are warm under your feet, and you can hear the waves of the sea lapping at the shore. You’ve spent four days working to build a raft, side by side with the goddess Calypso, but now it is time to set sail. In the water in front of you, you see a sturdy raft. Logs of aspen and alder are lashed together, a large sail stands in the center, and rations fill an end of the small boat. Take a step forward and feel the wood under your feet. Feel the raft rock under your feet, and step again fully onto the raft. Turn back to the shore, and listen to Calypso as she sends you off, lovingly and tearfully. Understand, that you are loved. Quiet time for 1 minute. Your raft drifts away from the island, and the sail catches the breeze, and pulls you deeper to sea. Sit back into the raft, and look up into the sky. Watch it turn from blue, to orange and red, purple, and finally black and filled with stars. Amongst the stars you see the Pleiades, Ursa Major, and Orion twinkling brightly. Several days pass uneventfully, giving you time to think about the world, and reflect upon yourself. As you once again approach land, you notice clouds beginning to fill the sky. In the distance you see a storm rolling your direction, and feel the winds pick up, pushing you again away from the shore. As you begin to feel despair, a gust of wind knocks you into the water. At first you’re overwhelmed by waves as they continue to crash into you, again and again. Quiet time for 1 minute. However, you don’t give up hope, and you continue to fight. You thrust your arm above the surf and feel your raft. Grasp the corner of a ship and pull yourself up onto the raft again. Seated upon your raft, Ino, ancient sea goddess sees you and takes pity upon you. She appears to you and shares her message with you. Quiet time for 1 minute. Ino tells you to release the raft and swim, and she will wrap you in a veil to keep you safe. While you contemplate holding your ground, Poseidon shatters the raft and you are again dropped into the sea. But Ino keeps her promise and wraps you tightly, keeping you safe until you reach the shore, safe and sound. Omen:
For this trance, I was on my fifth week of the Odyssey trance work. I once again performed a brief ritual before doing this trance. In this ritual, I honored Calypso, goddess and nymph from the mythical island of Ogygia and daughter of the Titan Atlas. I then described Calypso’s discussion with Odysseus while he is homesick. She tells him that she loves him and wants to keep him with her, but that she will set him free and help him to build a raft and give him supplies to return home. I then performed my trance during the “working” section of the ritual. Odysseus built a raft to help carry him home, and I wanted to simulate those actions. I decided to ask Calypso to aid me in building a raft of my own. However, instead of a raft to send me home, I wanted a raft to help me remember what it is that keeps me afloat when I feel lost at sea. I sat out my supplies, and began to focus. I stared at the sticks laid before me, and the strings that would bind them all together, focusing on them and what they represented. I visualized the important things in my life, those things that mean so much to me. I let my mind wander as I focused, running memories through my head. When I knew what I wanted to do, I reached for my small toolset and began carving into the wood. I could see the words seeming to lift out of the bark before I carved them in. I scratched in the name of some of the people closest to my heart, my family and friends. I carved the things I like most about myself. I wrote about the Kindreds that keep me moving forward on my path. Before long, I ran out of sticks to carve and was full of gratitude for all the joy that these things had brought into my life. I then picked up my ball of twine and began trying to bind all these sticks together. Some of the sticks seem to fit well together, while other seem to need to be bent or moved to work with the others. The work is hard and tiring. I feel my fingers slip and some sticks fall out of my small raft, and I have to begin again, doing the work over, but knowing I had to continue. As I began to again wrap the sticks in twine, binding them together, I felt a warmth in my hands like someone holding mine to guide me. My thoughts drifted to Odysseus and how desperately he missed his home and wanted to be with his family, and then to Calypso who let him free even though she so desperately wanted to keep him with her. I then found myself picturing the faces of my loved ones, and the memories that we have made together, and the potential for the future. Before I knew it, I looked at my hands and realized that the raft was finished, the sticks wrapped together securely in twine, with the words I had chosen carved into their wood. This trance work was much different than the other work I have done in the past. Typically, there are symbolic visions that help to guide my thoughts and work. However, with this working, there was only thoughts of my loved ones, with the symbolism being in the work I was doing with my hands. I ended this journey full of gratitude and love, overwhelmed by the things that help to keep me afloat when I can’t seem to find my own way home. |
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